The Biggest Library Yet - Issue 2

Interview with John Procter of I, Ludicrous reproduced with the prmission of Graham Coleman (thanks!) from Issue 2 of the excellent Fall fanzine The Biggest Library Yet.

Odran Smith's questions:

1 First Fall record you ever heard?

2 Favourite Fall songs ? (5)

3 Favourite Fall albums ? (2)

4 Do you think that the fact that you sent your music to Mark at an early date had a bearing on him liking you? I suspect it's also why he says he likes Suede but hates Pavement.

5 Do you have any 'Ludicrous on the road with The Fall' anecdotes to impart?

6 I thought Mark didn't like southerners. Comment.

7 Is Dave Bush much better at the synthesizer than you?

8 Mark often expounds upon some alien topics in interviews. When reading these articles, do you skip past it or mutter 'You tell 'em Mark' and on which topics? I know John Peel disagrees with him on most points.

9 Will you be supporting them in the future? They may come to Ireland in September!

10 Can you explain the humour of The Fall?

11 Trevor Long - the ex-manager of The Fall - isn't he the person Gentleman's Agreement was about? What was all that about?

John Procter replies:

Dear Odran,

The postman nicked the 2.50. Can you send it again? Ha! A joke.

Now to your questions. Of course, if this was NME you'd ask where I am now,p and what are the vibes like. I'm glad you didn't as I don't understand thosep funny hippy words.

As it is, I'm on a train and the vibrations are imparing my writing.

Here are the answers:

1 Bingo Master's Breakout, funnily enough. It came as a surprise, as it had keyboards on it, and was therefore not punk. I'd thought they were a punk group. I liked the voice, but didn't buy the record. It wasn't until Second Dark Age, Muzorewi's Daughter and other stuff off Dragnet that I realised I had to buy these records.

2 Impossible. But I'll have a go. Stop Mithering [sic] , Leave the Capitol, Big New Prinz, Paintwork, Second Dark Age, Words of Expectation. Will six do?

3 Bloody hard, these Alan Partridge questions. How about Grotesque and Perverted by Language.

4 I don't suppose he or the rest of The Fall would ever have heard of us. As we nicked the riff to Ludicrous off Slates, it was only courteous to forward a tape at the earliest opportunity. I think this got us off on the right foot, yes.

5 No.

6 We don't like northerners.

7 Yes, Dave Bush-babe used to be the lighting man, I think, and so was on our payroll for the duration of the 4-date 1990 tour.

8 Funnily enough, I find myself agreeing with just about everything Mark says, eg. death by nuclear bomb probably being preferable to death by bayonet; Andy Kershaw being a professional northener; the fat old Elvis being much better than the thin young Elvis. Mark talks a lot of sense.

9 Don't know. We were supposed to have supported them in May, but for some reason it didn't come off.

10 Probably funny because it's folk music (ask Mark). See Pay Your Rates, Container Drivers, Second Dark Age (I like that one), Spectre vs. Rector, My New House, A Lot of Wind - the everyday is funny. You get humour and horror in folk traditions. And irony - my favourite moment is on the Live at the Acklam Hall tape. After a lengthy and great rendering of Spectre vs. Rector, which the audience clearly hated, the next song is introduced as Spectre vs. Rector Part 2.

11 Trevor Long rubbed us up the wrong way from the start. But, in true Nietzchian style, we embraced our enemy (I learned that from Mark). By the end of the tour, Trevor was spending most of his time in our dressing room, which was very disturbing. Very disturbing indeed. Mark described Trevor as The Fall's guru, but we were wary of him.

I suspect Gentleman's Agreement to be about Trevor, but can shed no further light. The Birmingham School of Business School is more specfically about Trevor and his creative accounting techniques.

We'd like Trevor to be our manager. I'd like to see him make money out of I, Ludicrous - it'd be the first time.

That's it.

I expect you were looking forward to more on no. 5. but nothing remarkable happened - it's all documented in [the song] Bloody Proud . We went home every night. Sorry.

Regards, John.

More on # 5... Unlike Trevor, Mark made sure we were properly fed. And so did Craig and Steven, who offered us their last samosas at the Ritz gig in Manchester. Unfortunately, I was too nervous to eat! Hats off to The Fall.

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