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Three English Football Grounds

(written circa 1986)

Welcome to the Den, South-East 14
Do not believe all you see or read
We are not animals, we are human beings
Whose fans only resort to violence
in the face of immense provocation
Nearest station is New Cross Gate
3.50 to get in and the beer is good

Burndon Park - home of 'Trotters'
The ground stands surrounded by industrial dereliction.
For Bolton is feeling the pinch.
Still the fans have kept their sense of humour.
Despite a recent run of poor results.
Nearest station is Trinity Street.
3 to get in (because it's 'up north')
and the beer is cold

Craven Cottage, in one corner stands the cottage.
Unique, a reminder of an earlier age,
an age before the violence, before the air was filled with vile oaths
Opposite sits the brash new stand.
Overlooking the Thames, smug, expensive and empty.
There's an electronic scoreboard to gaze at when the play gets dull
which isn't often as Fulham play an attractive brand of football
4 to get in and the beer is mediocre

Three English Football Grounds

All lyrics © I, Ludicrous

* unreleased.

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